Happier at Home

I recently read Gretchen Rubin's Happier at Home. To be honest, I wasn't sure I'd like this book at the outset. Initially, the book wasn't what I thought it would be.

Rubin's premise is that she would be happier in general if she were happier in her own home. She started by rethinking her possessions. I didn't connect with this point. It seemed too "surface" to me - make "shrines" to things you love, pare down the things you don't need, read manuals so you can use what you have well. I almost shelved the book at this point.

Rubin transitioned to relationships - starting with marriage in the next chapter. Her ideas aren't profound, and occasionally she seems a bit self-focused. However, the simplicity of her suggestions are things that I can do in my own home.

Some of my favorites: give "gold stars" (words of encouragement to your spouse), go on adventures with your children, give warm greetings and farewells, respond to the spirit of a well-intentioned gift (even if you don't love it), celebrate holiday breakfasts.

Happier at Home isn't a traditional "help" book. It doesn't equip you to solve struggles in your marriage or family. But, it does offer practical, simple ideas to increase your happiness as well as the happiness of your family. And, it will remind you that all relationships take work.

I received this book for free from Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

Losing weight. Waiting.

What do losing weight and waiting have in common?

• I'm not good at either of them. 
• Both take time and patience.
• The Lord has lessons for me in both.

To be honest, I've never really earnestly tried to lose weight. I might succeed in dropping a pound or two, but one loaded with salt, fatty delicious Mexican food dinner would set me off course and stop me from trying.

So, almost three weeks ago, I decided to purposely try to lose 10 pounds. I'm tracking what I eat with My Fitness Pal and maintaining my usual exercise routine. While I am losing weight, I see how it takes so much discipline and self-control. These are not my strong suit. I'm seeking the Lord in this, wanting to not make weight loss an idol. But, I'm actually seeing how much food I really need, compared to what I often eat. It's been such a great lesson on needs versus wants. God has been pointing that out to me in other areas, too. Like the woman I met who has a borrowed car to use on Saturdays. The rest of the week, it's the bus or her own two feet. And yet I feel completely stranded if I'm without a car for the afternoon. 

I'm also learning about waiting on the Lord. When I get excited about something, I want to run out ahead. There are a couple of ministry opportunities that I want to jump into head first, but I'm trying to wait on the Lord to lead us. It's not easy for me. At all. But, I know He calls us to wait on Him. He'll "fight the battles" for me. So I wait.

A Taste of Radical

It's not often that one can read an entire book during a workout. However, I read David Platt's The Radical Question/A Radical Idea on the exercise bike this morning.

I loved Radical. It challenged me in so many areas. But, this brief book just whets your appetite for more. Maybe that's the intended purpose?

Platt calls into question what the American church is doing while so many in the world perish with out Jesus. "What is Jesus worth to you?" he asks. The second half of the book highlights Radical Together and reminds us that the church is people, not a place.

If you've never read (been afraid of?) Radical, this book might be just the place to start.

I received this book for free from Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

31 days of encouragement. Or, 5 days of not much.

Eight days into the month, and, more than anything, I'm seeing how challenging it is for me to be intentional about encouragement. Like any discipline, it takes practice. Time. Effort.

I've spoken a few words of blessing to my children. And a few words of impatience. Ugh. I'll keep trying. In fact, I just remembered someone who might need a word of encouragement today.

31 Days of Encouraging Words

On Monday, I read about bloggers linking up at nesting place for 31 Days of Change. More than 1000 bloggers signed up to write for 31 days about various topics. Ann Voskamp, one of my favorites, is writing about 31 days to crazy joy. It inspired me to take up my own 31-day experiment in encouraging words.

The Lord's definitely been moving me in this direction. As I recall, speaking encouraging words was my prayer request last month at my moms group. But, in my typical fashion, I'm a little late getting started. It took me a day to be convinced to try it. Day 2 was spent speaking encouraging words to myself (read: remembering that I'm supposed to build up, not tear down). By bedtime, I was reminded to praise my little one, who totally blossoms when watered with words of affirmation.

Today, Day 3, I began seeking the Lord in this in earnest. No surprise, He had much direction to give. I was reminded to send off a swift text to a couple of friends. Not terribly personal, but better than nothing at all. The responses were a blessing to me.

I also remembered to thank my sweet husband for some above-and-beyond things he did yesterday. And, the Lord gave me a few ideas to act on in the coming days.

I saw the power of affirming words this afternoon in the eyes of the girls in our after-school mentoring group. Each of us wrote something encouraging in each girl's journal. Sweet D told one of the other leaders, "Did you see what everyone wrote about me?" Clearly, the words written achieved God's desired effect. She was blessed.

I'm looking forward to seeing where the Lord leads me this month. And I'm hoping for some lasting change.

Truly. Simply Jesus.

I recently read Joseph Stowell's Simply Jesus. I so enjoyed reading this book. Stowell's love for the Lord and closeness to Him drew me in.

His main point? "You can be satisfied to just know about Him, or you can enter into an experience with Jesus." I don't know about you, but I definitely want to experience Him.

Stowell addresses why many of us don't have a closer walk with the Lord. Simply put, He's not our priority. (Painful, but so true.) We'd rather put ourselves first than put Him first. We must clean our slates, so to speak, through confession and repentance. And not get caught up in ourselves, our own good works.

The good news, Stowell reminds us, is that Jesus rewards those who seek Him. And, once you've tasted His goodness, you can never get enough.

Stowell points out the changes we need to make: rejoice in the Lord, in what He has done, and value Jesus above everything. He will meet us in our hard places when we totally surrender to Him.

I only wish this book were longer! The upside? It's a quick read.

I received this book for free from Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

Listen to the sound of my voice

"It's not what you say; it's how you say it." Can't tell you how many times I've heard that phrase in my life. Sadly, in our house, it's so true.

There are three of us who could use an Extreme Tone Makeover. Or maybe pride liposuction. I started hearing it in one of our children a while back - the sound of my own voice, Brian's voice. A bit of sarcasm, a strong desire to be right, a driving desire to have the last word. If you're not listening like I think you should, I'll just be quicker to interrupt, firmer in the restating of my opinion.

It's not what the Lord desires for our interactions. Truly, I want my words to be:

• Proverbs 25:11 "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver."
• Colossians 4:6 "Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone."
• Ephesians 4:29 "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."

I love Third Day's song, "Sound of your voice." It describes Zeph 3:17, where the Lord sings over us. It what I want our kids, really all who encounter us, to hear - the Lord singing over them.

Singing over me

Bringing mercy and peace

With a song that never ends

Signing over me

Marvelous and holy

Lord, I want to hear your song again

Drawn into worship

If you desire to grow in your worship of the Lord for who He is, to deepen your praise of Him, pick up a copy of Jerry Bridges' 31-day devotional I Exalt You, O God. Admittedly, I have been wandering in a bit of a spiritually dry place. So, reading this devotional was well-timed refreshment for me.

The book is divided into four sections: exalting God for his greatness, holiness, wisdom and love. Each day, Bridges addresses a quality of God's character found in Scripture and explains it in practical terms. Each entry ends with a beautiful prayer, rooted in the Scriptures. The prayers alone are a treasure!

I have been challenged by everything I've read by Jerry Bridges, and this book is no different. An excellent devotional, worth reading again and again.

I received this book for free from Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

I forget what He has done.

They forgot what he had done, the amazing things he had shown them. Psalm 78:11

Reflection and remembering. It's something we're called to as believers. But, it seems like - at least in our fast-paced American culture - that instead of remembering, we're always looking forward to the next big thing. Or, looking around at what we don't have.

I started on my journey of remembering, of giving thanks, after reading Ann Voscamp's One Thousand Gifts a little more than a year ago. The process of slowing down, writing down my thanks decidedly changed me. But, nearly 2400 "thank yous" later, I find myself feeling stale, struggling to see his abundant goodness in my life.

How is that possible? This great and mighty God, creator of the universe, giver of life and all gifts, stoops to meet my needs every day. How do I lose sight of that? By taking my focus off of him.

I'm challenged to turn to the pages of Scripture, to look at his work in ages past. He mightily saved his people again and again (despite their forgetfulness). He literally parted the sea on their behalf.

I can open my eyes to his creation, shouting his name around me. Job recognized that this magnificent creation is but the "outer fringes of his ways. How faint is the whisper we hear of him!" (Job 26:14) He measures the waters of the earth in the palm of his hand. I can only measure about a teaspoon of salt in mine.

Finally, I need to look back at the journal of thanksgiving in my possession. My story with him over the past year. 

Oh, Father, cause me to see your movement in my life every day. Help me to remember to give thanks. How quickly I forget your mighty works on my behalf. How you sustain me day by day, giving me the capacity to breathe my next breath. 

Life in the Spirit

Life is only fully lived by the power of the Holy Spirit. It's taken me years to even begin to understand this truth. John 10:10 eluded me - "I came that they may have life, and may have it abundantly."

Not surprisingly, my efforts at self-sanctification have been a colossal failure. Only day by day, spending time in His presence, do I begin to bear the slightest resemblance of Christ. Only relying on Him to fill me, lead me, do I experience this fullness of life.

I was reminded of that this morning, as I spent time in prayer. The past few days, I have subjected those around me to my natural, sinful self. Frustrations and fears have plagued me. Doubts have taken up residence. Only after listening to the Lord was I reminded that time with Him has not been my priority these past days. No wonder the wheels were coming off and my joy had vacated.

I was also reminded of the conversation with our son the evening prior. He'd spent the day making impulsive decisions, and we were discussing it with him. I reminded him that life is only fully lived by the power of the Holy Spirit. The ability to choose wisely comes by seeking the Lord.

But, like me, he can't tap into this gift if he's not spending time with the Lord. If our sweet son didn't know where to find food, didn't know how to feed himself, I would most certainly bring food to him. Like the friends of the paralytic, I need to bring him to Jesus, this Bread of life.

I was drawn to Deuteronomy 6, to the Lord's charge to not only remember these truths, but to teach them to my children. Am I obeying this command? He wants us to talk about Him, His Word, His Son all the time - when we wake up and lie down, when we sit and when we walk. Then, when the Lord brings us to the promised land, full of things we did not accumulate, vineyards we did not plant, we will not forget Him - the One who brought us out of slavery.

Oh, how I'm challenged to share my bits of knowledge of who God is.  To look together with my children into the pages of Scripture to see Him and then more clearly recognize His work in our lives.

Living water

I sat by the river this morning watching the current flow down. Despite my inability to catch any of the river's beautiful rainbow trout, I knew the water was teeming with life. My mind wandered to Jesus, who described himself to the woman at the well as living water. 

I asked God this morning to grow my knowledge of Him while I'm here. There's definitely something in the water. It's ever-flowing, moving on. It's full of life - trout and other fish. It sustains so many things around it - the tall trees that line the water's edge, the eagles, the deer and other little creatures who leave their tracks in the mud. It delights and soothes this family who returns over the years to spend a week in its presence.

Do I remember that Jesus is this beautiful, sustaining, living water? Do I live like it's the water that flows through me? Do I find Him truly, deeply refreshing?

Just like beautiful fish hide in this river, Paul tells the church at Colosse that in Jesus are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. The living water Jesus offers is full of life, abundant life, if I choose to drink deeply. Why do I try to find satisfaction in the world's intoxicating, deadly drink?

Father, draw me to the living water. Fill me. Flow through me. Forgive me for seeking satisfaction apart from you. Make me grow sturdy and strong, sustained only by you.

Cleaning house and shaping character

Earlier this summer, a dear friend began Cleaning House: A Mom's Twelve-Month Experiment to Rid Her Home of Youth Entitlement by Kay Wills Wyma. She invited her friends to join her in reading the book. I passed. But, after hearing another friend praise the book and having an opportunity to review the book, I joined her on her journey.

Basically, Wyma realized that her children, ages 4 to 14, were a bit spoiled and ill-equipped to "fly on their own" later in life. For 12 months, she addressed a different responsibility each month. She started with the basics - making beds and decluttering bedroom floors. Other months included preparing meals, cleaning bathrooms, maintaining the yard, working outside the home, washing laundry, running errands and more.

As you might expect, she encountered much resistance initially. But, with a bit of whining and grumbling, her kids rose to the occasion. I was more inspired by the heart change in her kids than the behavior changes she saw through this "experiment."

Wyma is a Christian, and she weaves her faith into the story. Honestly, I would have enjoyed an even greater connection to her faith throughout the book. We were created for work, even before the fall. Wyma's efforts at training her children tapped into this part of who they are, in my opinion.

This book is more of Wyma's journal through her journey than a practical, application-for-my-family kind of book. But, I enjoyed it and have been inspired to do a little "experimenting" in my own family.

I received this book for free from Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

Bind the captives!

I've probably seen too many pirate movies. The idea of captives totally resonates with me. I'm so visual; I can just picture a pirate prodding his bound, helpless captives off the plank.

Lately, I've wrestled with a mostly irrational fear. While the fear coming to pass is a possibility, it's something I can do nothing about. I find myself rationalizing, pleading with God, ignoring it - I've tried the full array of ineffective solutions.

But God, in his tender mercy, keeps drawing me back to 2 Corinthians 10:5 -

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

I keep picturing these fearful thoughts - bound, gagged, handed over to Christ. He's the victor; he knows what to do with these lies. Every time one crops up, I wrestle it loose and hand it over.

But, there's more to the verse. I've been pondering what Paul means by demolishing arguments that set themselves up against the knowledge of God. I hope I'm not misinterpreting, but I believe I need to take demolish every rationalization I make, every thought I have about why something wouldn't happen to me. Those things are lies in contrast with the truth of the gospel and God's great love for me.

So, I will continue to ask Christ to make these fears and lies "walk the plank." Instead, I'll remember the great, merciful love he has for me and rest in his care.

Extending boundaries

Our kiddos are growing up. It's unavoidable, and so obvious, as D stretches out to almost my height. Wow. As they grow, Brian and I realize that we need to stretch their boundaries as well. I've been really contemplating this as I've read Cleaning House by Kay Wyma. But, I've discovered it's more about extending their responsibilities than their privileges. Our kids are capable. We need to let them take charge. Armed with this information, we've challenged Mimi, or promoted her, to appetizer chef. Basically, we've tasked her with preparing something for us to nibble on as the afternoon turns into early evening. She loves the creativity, socialization, service and, frankly, power. The girl likes to be in charge! For the moment, she's simply pulling together fruits and veggies, crackers, and cheese. But, it fills the family's ever-hungry tummies with healthy(ish) snacks and empties our frig. Today, she and D took the reins at Trader Joe's and selected cheeses that will grace our table this week. D chose Gouda; Mimi chose goat cheese. I'm looking forward to both of them! As we're stretching them, the Lord is stretching me - more like prying my fingers away from my desire to control everything. I'm thankful that He continues to shape and conform me. And, the benefits keep coming. Sweet Mimi just asked if I wanted a glass of water as she headed to the kitchen. Love that girl and her big heart!

Who influenced CS Lewis?

I love reading books by CS Lewis. Hs way of thinking is engaging and inspiriing to me. When I heard about "From the Library of CS Lewis," I was intrigued, eager to explore the writings of men and women who influenced Lewis. The book does not disappoint. It is packed with exerpts from a variety of authors. An excellent resource. However, it's not a book that one would sit down and read through. The writings are grouped by topic, but I found them a bit disjointed to simply read one after another. Each had "something to chew on," more like a devotional. I wanted to pause after reading each one to ponder its truths. I think it will be an excellent resource in the future. Additionally, the book does not go into detail about how each writer influenced Lewis. I received this book for free from Waterbrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.